You Know It’s Time to Go Home When

You know it’s time to get off the road and head home when:

  1. It takes you more than 10 minutes to figure out where you are when you wake up.
  2. You lose the ability to remember your hotel room number.
  3. You start choosing McDonalds over hotel breakfast buffets.
  4. You can’t shake that persistent cold/flu/sinus infection because your immune system took a vacation and forgot to tell you.
  5. You spend an hour before bed re-arranging your suitcase and think of it as “nesting behavior.”
  6. A can of tuna and a handful of crackers tastes better than anything on the room service menu in your five-star hotel.
  7. You start snarling at elevators (elevator: “ninth floor!” Me: “Piss off.”)
  8. You look up at departing airliners with undisguised envy.
  9. You know the names of the kids of the housekeepers on your floor.
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